The other day, I was sitting at the computer while E ate breakfast. He started telling me about a dream he had. I was only half-listening, but a phrase he said caught my ear. “I don’t know what it means,” he said. “I mean, I know what it means, but I think there’s more to it.” That night, as I was making dinner, he mentioned it again, so I had him repeat the dream to me. We were on a bus or something with a whole bunch of people, and I was going around blessing everyone. When I got to E my blessing was, “From a family of fear to a family of love.” Well, I’m not sure how much he wants to read into that. It’s pretty clear to me.
And now we’re experiencing another first: I’m sick. I’m pretty sure it’s the flu. We were supposed to go see my sister last night, as we haven’t seen her, her husband, and my three nephews (one of whom is 3 mo old) since just after Christmas. The last time we tried, her middle one got Hand, Foot, and Mouth disease. Now it’s my turn. I picked E up at the bus stop yesterday afternoon, having told him in the morning that we’d see how I felt later and keep our options open. When I told him we couldn’t go, his face fell. He’d really been looking forward to getting out of town. I explained that my fever had returned and I didn’t want to get anybody else sick. He came over to me and hugged me and started crying. “I know it’s disappointing,” I said. “I’m disappointed too.”
“It’s not just that,” he replied. “I don’t like you not feeling well.” I think he’d honestly been worried the night before that I’d die (he mentioned it in a joke, but I could tell there was honesty behind it). He is so tender-hearted and caring. In any event, he went to sleep over a friend’s house so I could get extra rest, which was helpful. I was a hot mess last night, coughing and blowing my nose and achy and feverish. I’m a little better today, but I have a feeling someone will be bored with the quiet day I have in mind…
birch & raven 